Sunday, January 22, 2012

Do anniversaries matter?

[image source]

This evening I was languidly lazing on our over-sized couch, flipping through one of my birthday presents - Jamie Oliver's 30 Minute Meals. I saw a likely feast that was a) in my skill range b) didn't require a food processor c) didn't have exotic ingredients and most importantly d) might be something my other half would eat.

I showed it to C and asked him if he'd eat that. He asked what yorkies were and I explained they are like dumpling things. He said yes. I said perhaps I could make it for our anniversary...?

He gave me a strange look. Then he said,

"Baby, our anniversary was on Friday."

"What? It's on the 20th though! What's the date today?"

"The 22nd."

I immediately started tearing up and apologising. He just smiled and ruffled my hair. Told me it was alright. Admitted he'd thought about it.

"But why didn't you say anything! It's our five years!" I wailed.

He said he didn't realise about the five years part, but again said it didn't really matter that I'd forgotten.

I pulled myself together and realised the only person upset in this conversation was me. He really didn't mind. He wasn't fussed that we hadn't gone out, or cooked a special dinner, or given each other gifts.

Later, when I shared this story with Twitter, I realised that we will have a new anniversary soon - not the date of our first date, but of our wedding. Wow.

So is it just my beloved partner or do men, as a rule, not really care that much about anniversaries? Or is it just important to some people more than others, whatever their gender? Why do we celebrate yearly milestones like birthdays and anniversaries? Is it a way of saying "hey, congratulations, another year has gone by!" - or do we just like an excuse to give and get more presents?


  1. I think men like the anniversary for it's own sake, the "It's this big!" sort of aspect. Hubby confirmed this, but...
    Hubby also says that "he'd be happy cos he's got "one in the bank" now, in case he forgets next time". ;-)

  2. I barely remember our dating anniversary. I know it's in September sometime.. the wedding anniversary kind of overshadows it all.

    My husband and I really get into our wedding anniversary. We give gifts according to the traditional anniversary gift guide and spent a fair bit of money and make a to-do. I think it's important for both of us to make a bit of effort.

    Try not to stress too much about missing the date. I almost missed my husband's birthday once, for the same reason- I lost track of the date and thought we were still at the beginning of the month!

  3. Anniversaries are very important to me, it's not the anniversary of our first date for me, its the time where we both first realized that we belong together and James being as private as he is burst out that he loved me, and everything and anything else he thought about me.

    It will most likely get taken over by our wedding anniversary when we have it, but I am determined to keep our anniversary alive. Everything else is so... public, birthdays, Christmas, Easter, even Valentines Day, but an anniversary? That is something that only involves me and him. And to have that just waved by with nothing? I don't think so. Plus, we hardly go out on dates anyway, thanks to James being unemployed at the moment. I want a night to dress up and do something different, or do something fantastic. Go all out if we want to. We deserve that. And to be honest, I deserve the special attention too.

  4. I used the word anniversary five times in that comment! Wow~ ahaha xx



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